Day 12 - Gold Star Please ***

Today I attended my conference which was quite lavish in terms of food ... Coffee and Danish upon arrival; more and then some for first break; did not see the lunch but speakers praised it; and then finally more coffee and variety of cakes for last break! By the way the Confernce was very good too and motivating.

I realised something today and with glee talked to hubby who seemed to get what I was talking about. I have a choice ....

If I want to be slim and healthy forever I can choose to make good choices, rather than perhaps having everything that is on offer. And unfortunately I come form the school of not wanting to miss out or feel somebody has missed me out. Hence I will have that danish etc etc because I've paid for it, everybody else is having one and life can't be fair if I have to miss out and so it continues.

I noticed in the last break when in the queue for my black coffee, that two slightly overweight men were getting excited about the cake available. I suddenly realised I can have a piece (once off abstinence and maintaining) but what I can probably not have is high fat food at all sittings on a regular basis and not expect consequences. I also noticed that at neither break was I hungry but realise had I not been on LL I would of had something at each sitting as it's part of the routine on a course.

I also realise that I do not attend a course every week and maybe even ocassionally I could get away with a bit of something at each sitting, but that would have to mean I could not go home and crack open the wine and go out friday night for a meal and still expect to have a saturday night takeaway too. I know none of this is rocket science, and believe me I have read books, magazines, listend to WW, SW etc leaders telling me this over the years however I suppose I never really belived it or fully commited to it.

Take a typical takeaway that my hubby and I would share. I would plough through eating what was my full share even when my stomach told me ages ago it was full (if I heard it at all) and even when I need to undo clothes and feel uncomfortable. Hubby will eat his and always, always leaves stuff on his plate. What a waste I cry. I am sure you are not surprised to hear my hubby has never been overweight and does not always understand the struggle which can go on in my head.

OK, that's enough rambling on now. I hope I haven't baffled too many of you with such drift. It is all starting to make sense to me.

On that note am off to make some crisps and try tobasco sauce hubby has bought for me.


TIPS OF TODAY

1. I really enjoyed the chopped up bar that I chomped with my black coffee at each break
2. I returned to my car at lunchtime and made my soup. As much as not knowing what facilities were at the venue, I did not want to be looked at either like a victim or be questioned at this stage in the game.